Thursday, August 11, 2011

The Phantom Puppies

My dog, Fats, is going through her second phantom pregnancy. It is awful and really hard on her. We thought we'd just let her have a litter of puppies this time around to let her experience having the pups and then sterilise her but alas, the sausage dog just couldn't, well, um, figure it out. He just didn't know what to do. He had a rough idea but well, it just never happened and I don't intervene in, um, intimate relations between any species at all and so fat Fats failed to fall pregnant.

Unfortunately, she has started lactating and spends hours every night trying to make a bed for her imaginary puppies on Al and my bed, always involving the pillow my head is on. As a result, we are both exhausted every day and I never get the full use of my pillow.

The last time we bought her a teddy in the hopes that she would treat it like a puppy but alas, she's had a teddy since she was tiny and she knows that they're just there to play with and so she slowly pulled poor teddy to pieces.

We give her lots and lots of attention usually but even more so when she's going through this. I let her sit on my lap while I watch TV and rub her tummy and talk to her in a soft tone and I play catch with her every weekend and run around the garden with her and spend ages just rubbing her tummy and feeding her biscuits or other doggy treats to distract her, but this time she seems quite adamant that she's having puppies.

So I was wondering if we should get her to foster some puppies who don't have a mom for whatever reason or if, when they had to be given back or re homed, she would pine even more.

Does anyone have an answer to this? She is such a sweet and loving doggy and seeing her so sad and depressed is really upsetting because I can't say to her "It's just your hormones, Fatness, you'll be ok" and so the poor doggy is left thinking she's having pups and then later that she's had them and that they're missing. It's awful.